Category Archives: Musings

What if I choose the wrong one?

Musings, Places, ,

We visited St. Mary’s College in southern Maryland yesterday with my high school junior. She liked it. We liked it. She’s got a chance of being accepted there.

At the end of the week we’ll visit two more colleges – one in New Jersey and one of three in Pennsylvania. Clare needs to choose which of the three we visit in Pennsylvania. She just called up to me to ask, “What am I looking for?” I replied, “The college you want to visit.” She then asked, “What if I choose the wrong one?”

Now, that is a good question. What if I choose the wrong one? How many times have I worried about that? As a kid with limited spending money — What if I choose the wrong item at the five and dime? As a young woman thinking about getting married — What If I choose the wrong man to marry? As a career woman — What if I choose the wrong job offer? At any restaurant — What if I choose the wrong entré? As a homeowner — What if I choose the wrong shade of paint for the living room?

It goes on and on. You cannot possibly visit every campus just as you cannot paint your living room every shade in the paint store.

The thing about getting older is the fact that you know that you can usually change your mind. Even a bad college choice can be fixed. And if you visit the wrong college during spring break, you can visit one that is more right later.

Decisions are hard. Most of the time. Sometimes you never know if you made the right decision. It’s all a part of life.

Clare will make good decisions — based on her criteria. And if she makes a mistake she’ll eventually learn that mistakes are rarely irrevocable.

That said, I need to tell myself that. I need to be more decisive. I often sit back and let Dean make the decisions because I worry, “What if I choose the wrong one?”

Signing off

Musings,

I’m never sure how to close an email. Some closings sound impersonal, some sound pretentious and some sound just too gushy. I end up often not putting anything before my name because I don’t know what to put.

If I’m asking a question or for a favor, I’ll usually write, “Thanks,”. But then after a while it seemed too abrupt. If I really am grateful I’ll say, “Thanks so much,” but that sometimes feels too gushy. I tend to write “Thanks,” even when I’m just sending information sometimes, meaning, thanks for reading this, but I need something else.

I know several people who close with, “Cheers,” but unless the person is actually Australian or British, it doesn’t make sense to me. I’d feel pretentious using it, although I did for a while.

Someone I know who always seems to be barking orders at others signs her emails, “Cordially,” which feels as cold as most of her emails. Ending her emails with “Cordially,” sends shivers up my spine – for, in my dictionary, someone who is cordial, is not friendly. I see the Queen of England (or Dame Judy Dench) when I think of “Cordially.”.

I don’t like to use formal letter closings such as  “Sincerely,”  “Yours Truly,” or “Respectfully yours,” to close an email because that, I think,  lessens the formality of formal letters.

For a while I’d sign off my emails (usually on email lists) with: Dona <—who <insert witty and topic appropriate comment here>, but that got to be 1) difficult to think of what to say and 2) annoying to other folks.

My husband signs off with “Best” in his business emails. I kind of like that, but not sure I could pull it off.

Other closings I’ve come across are, “Bye,” (too curt),  “Regards,” and “Kind Regards,” (eh, ok I guess — a little formal for an email though)

Oh my — someone’s done a study on this.  And this website does a good job of explaining what to use as a closing depending on the type of email being sent.

So Kind Regards, and Until Next Time, I remain Your’s Truly and Sincerely,

Dona <–who will probably continue to use “Thanks.” or nothing at all.