Tag Archives: kindness

Clare’s Most Famous Autograph

Events, Family, Memories, Music, Things, ,

Remember autograph books? I still have mine — it’s got the “Love Is…” characters on it. Clare got one at one point — maybe she was in middle school. She had friends and teachers sign it. I just found it during our Great Knee Wall Purge of 2023.

One night I was planning on taking her to go see my favorite singer/songwriter, Dan Bern. Clare was unable to go with me — maybe she was sick. Anyway, I went on my own. We decided that maybe I could have Dan write his autograph her new autograph book.

I got to the venue (Iota Club & Cafe in Arlington, VA) early, saved a seat for myself and grabbed dinner from next door. After eating I sat and listened to the sound check and chatted with my friend Marc (may he rest in peace). I mentioned to Marc that I was going to bring my daughter, but she couldn’t make it but she wanted Dan’s autograph. He immediately beckoned me to approach the stage and ask Dan now instead of later. Dan said he was happy to sign her book and asked what her name was.

I expected him to sign his name, and maybe write a quick note. I sat back down while he was writing — it seemed to take a while and I wondered if he didn’t know what to say and started getting embarrassed. Minutes later he handed me the book and said he hoped it was okay with Clare that he used more than one page. I was dumfounded when I looked at what he wrote. And drew.

What he did was so kind and selfless. I remember thinking that he’d be a great dad someday. And he is! His daughter Lulu is probably about the age Clare was when Dan wrote this for Clare.

A gift

Birds, People, Things, ,

In 2000 when I graduated from George Washington University with a Master’s degree my mom, and her two sisters pooled their money and bought me a Lenox mug that featured an illustration of a cedar waxwing (by artist Catherine McClung), my favorite bird and my online persona on several forums. I knew that they’d spent a fair amount on it because Mom cautioned me that it should probably not be used.

I heeded her warning and didn’t use the mug for several years but in April 2013 I decided to start using it, a decision I documented on Facebook:


Fast forward to a little over a month ago during our kitchen renovation, when, while washing dishes in the basement, Dean accidentally knocked the mug to the cement floor where it broke in several pieces. I heard it, I knew what it was and my heart momentarily froze and when he showed me what happened, I replied, “Don’t worry about it. It was bound to happen sometime. I got lots of years out of it.” And strangely, that was how I really felt.

Of course I documented it on Facebook.

The responses were heartwarming and several friends tried to help me find a replacement, at least one even offering to buy me one.

I could not find the exact mug and felt that buying one would be cheating. Part of its appeal was because it was from three special people in my life who were no longer with us.

Two days after the mug was broken my brother commented with a photo of the mug and later said it was an early Christmas gift to me in memory of Mom. It turned out that he found a set of four Lenox bird mugs online and bought them for me.

Screenshot of FB conversation. Kevin: Mom is excited all over again, she made me do it. Love you. Me: Where did you find this? Kevin: I have my sources. It's actually a set of 4. An early Xmas present in memory of mom. Dad is represented too with the blue bird. Me: I am speechless!

I got them a week or so later and put them in my China cabinet. I’ll use them someday, but not right now.

Kevin buying them for me was such a surprise, but when I think of it, not that much of a surprise. He’s always been a kind and thoughtful person. I’m lucky he’s my brother.