All posts by Dona

Old Photographs

I’ve been (slowly) scanning old photographs from my mother and uploading them to flickr. Mom knows I’m doing this and when I first started doing it about two years ago, gave me the photographs. This time, however, I just took a large bagful. Some are of people and events that don’t mean anything to me, and they are not old enough for me to care about. But some tell a story.

Today I found a photograph of my mother when she was about the same age as my daughter.

Mom — Patricia Green, aged 16

The back of the photograph tells the whole story. She must have sent it to my father when he was in the Navy.

Back of photo of Mom

When my mom was 15 or 16 her mother or father suggested she write to a sailor whose brother-in-law they knew from the Moose. She did and I guess, fell in love pretty quickly. Well, who wouldn’t? Dad was a handsome and charming man. They wrote back and forth (mom still has her letters from Dad but he threw hers away) while he was overseas and met up when he was back on leave.

Dad’s Navy Photograph

They married when she was 18 and he was 26 – eight years difference between the two.

My daughter is 15 years old. If I knew she would meet a 25 year old next year and marry him in three years, I think I’d send her to a convent.

Old photographs are fun to look at. They usually bring happy memories. Too often, though, they are a huge time-sink.

Not another blog!

I’ve had this weblog for months – maybe even a year and all I have done with it is change the template. I spend most of my online time on Blogger where I have several blogs going at once.

I also have been spending some time on Vox, which is a sibling (or child?) of LiveJournal (where I have a journal or two).

The biggest reason I have not written anything here is because I don’t know what I want this blog to be. Cedar Waxwing has far too many nests around the Internet. She needs to find a real home and plant some roots.

On Writing

Tomorrow I will write this post about writing. Promise.

I wrote that about nine months ago. Enough time in which to incubate a human in a womb. At the time I still had hopes of really writing. Writing for an audience. Writing a story. Writing to be published.

Not now though. Really. I still will write for myself, mostly because it feels good. The feel of words flowing out of my fingertips is just plain delicious. Sure, occasionally (more often than I like) something comes out under-ripe or bitter or too sweet. But the feeling of setting the perfect words or phrases in a paragraph is like eating a perfectly ripe plum or peach. Without the dribble.

You may ask why I’ve given up on writing for others. That’s simple. My mom quit believing in me. She now believes in my daughter instead. As she should. My daughter has been invited to join her school’s literary magazine. She’s that good. So mom gave my daughter a book about writing that she’d originally purchased for me. When she gave it to my daughter she said, “I bought this for your mom. Did you know she wanted to be an author?”

I thought Clare knew my dream, but I guess not because she was surprised at my mom’s words.

Why am I not an author? Well, aside from lack of talent, I don’t like criticism. I fear failure as well.

But it should not really matter. If I like writing, then I should write; whether or not I write for anyone is irrelevant.